Again, Rob-the-Boyfriend, subbing for David, who is subbing for Faustus (who may be subbing for some British bloke[s] at this very moment, but I digress.)

Faustus is in London; I got an e-mail from him this morning about various things that might have to be taken care of if he were delayed by a baggage handlers’ strike. (Oh, that’s what the kids are calling it now.) He promised to call me when he was back “Stateside.”

I need to have more conversations in which words like “stateside” are used. This is why Faustus is handy to have around.

Anyway, onto my day.

After I finished at school, I decided to walk through the Village over to the 1 train, since it was a nice night out. As I passed through Astor Place, there was a guy I recognized. I thought, “Is that some actor I know? Somebody connected with school?” No, it was somebody connected with my main preoccupation: TiVo. It was Tom Kaden, one of the first guinea pigs on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. Tom was the one whose girlfriend Lisa’s appearance prompted Carson to say, “There’s a hooker in Trenton who wants her boots back.”

Anyway, looks like he is still getting his hair styled, so the pixiedust hasn’t worn off. Yet.

When I got to the corner of Sixth Avenue and 8th Street, a girl bellowed “I’M A-GONNA DO A MAGIC TRICK!”

Immediately, we were all interested enough to shoot a sideways glance. Okay, the traffic light just turned red. You have two minutes. Go.

She looked like she wasn’t from New York – typically Middle American looking, nondescript, sturdy (okay, overweight), with a hoarse voice carrying a Tennessee twang. She held up three lengths of peppermint-stripe shoelaces, the kind WitchiePoo might use. But she wore boots. Never mind.

“These strings are three different kinds of people. This short string is a good person. If an old lady needs to cross the street, he’s a-gonna help her across. This middle string is a regular person. If she falls, then maybe he might help her up. But she can probly take care of her own self.”

We looked at each other. We’re all short string people, we thought to ourselves. Yes, indeed.

“Now this LOOOONG string, that’s a bad person. An old lady is crossing the street, he’s a-gonna RUN HER DOWN. And LAFF ABOUT IT!”

We laughed. We were an easy crowd. Still a “Don’t Walk” sign facing us.

“Now, I’m a-gonna tell you about someone who sees these people-strings ALL THE SAME!” We knew this part was coming, but hey, I wanted to see some magic.

As she stuffed the strings into her palm and shook them out again, now all transformed into the same length, she hit her main theme: “That person is JESUS CHRIST.”

Polite applause. Whoa, light is turning soon.

“Now, my friend here is gonna tell you some MORE about Him.” She motioned to her companion, a slightly gangly but pleasant and serious looking guy. They were both probably about 22 or 23. He had an easel set up, with a watercolor brush in hand. He began painting some shapes – outlines of squares, zigzaggy lines inside the squares – and explaining in a very, very quiet voice what he was doing.

”Loud!” his magician-for-the-Lord friend growled.

He tried to speak louder, but his voice still wasn’t up to the task of competing with Sixth Avenue traffic.

Oops. Light changed. Bye.

Wherever they had come from, they had certainly set a challenge for themselves. New Yorkers are a tough crowd, although they’ll usually stand around and gape for a few minutes at somebody who pipes up.

At least until the light changes, anyway.